Marriages in India: an evoluing institution

In India, the family head is responsible to marry his children, especially his daughters. In highly conservative circles or in the countryside, adolescents going through puberty are still united. Men marry later, around 26 years on average, but there is no question of staying single. Today, with the advent of new technologies and new ways of life, traditions are shaken ...

There is a site accessible on smartphone (shaadi.com) is a Hindu dating site, and it is not the parents who impose a wedding, but the bride and groom ("futurs mariés") who choose.
Only in France is not me expected the advent of the Internet to change the traditions ...

Florent I had a look on shaadi.com and I love its publicity
"we bring people together, love unites them"

Muriel
Do you read the entire article in Vocable (p10 mag of now)
I am surprised that there are such archaic behaviours in the XXI centuty!
I don't understand how to inpose a wife .. and how a boy can accept "that"

Hi Muriel, Florian,

This behavior existed in France 100 years ago.

It still does exist in many countries; I didn't count them but I'd not be surprised if it were the majority.
In India (big percentage of the world's population), all the family is severely punished so fathers have to protect the family and ban love unions.
I have the counter-example of an American friend who married an Indian girl. So, the bride was a foreigner, he didn't have the same religion; in addition the father was the head od a strict religious group (the ones who may not kill an animal, including a mosquito): the groom had to wait for years, he adopted many customs, learned the dialect, etc. convonced the brothers and the father accepted.
The result is that Eric married Deepty. after many years in Delhi, they now live in southern California and they have 2 boys.
Moreover, Deepty asked Ann, her sister-in-law, to take care of her sons in case of an lethal accident. As Ann explained she didn't know about their religion, Deepty responded it didn't matter as long as she loved the kids.
Deepty is very kind. When I met her, she offerred me a book about her religion, and country.

This behavior existed in France 100 years ago.

Hi Gérard, Florent !
My grand-mother's parents organized her marriage. She didn't want to get married when her mother told her that she had found somebody for her. She was determined not to accept.
By chance that somebody was the nice young man she had a crush on and passed under her window every morning.

My brother has a friend how is algerian. He visit his family for holiday and he come back with a wife!

Hi Florent,

Admin a écrit:My brother has a friend how is algerian. He visit his family for holiday and he come back with a wife!

Who came back with a wife? Your brother or the friend?
Who chose the wife?

No, the friend comes back from Algeria with a wife choosen by his family!

Florent,

Admin a écrit:No, the friend comes back from Algeria with a wife choosen by his family!

There're 2 mistakes in your sentence (at least if it was weeks/months ago)

Florent,

Decades ago, I was working in a very big French company.
There were workers from black Africa. They were very funny as they used to walk on the sidewalks in single file. They were very kind and I liked to talk with them, especially one who was the son of the chief of a tribe: he was very happy to have a good job in France as with the money he made, he could buy several cows in order to get several wives; as a son of the chief, he must have several wives due to his status.

However, I'm unable to say who was choosing the wives: he or his father.

In France, it's different now. First you make love, then you make one or two children, and then you see if you are made one for the other

So true Remy !

So you say you MUST make love BEFORE having a baby, are you sure????

No, you musn't. Nowadays you can have a baby without making love, of course. However, in most cases...

Admin a écrit:

In India, the family head is responsible to marry his children, especially his daughters. In highly conservative circles or in the countryside, adolescents going through puberty are still united. Men marry later, around 26 years on average, but there is no question of staying single. Today, with the advent of new technologies and new ways of life, traditions are shaken ...

There is a site accessible on smartphone (shaadi.com) is a Hindu dating site, and it is not the parents who impose a wedding, but the bride and groom ("futurs mariés") who choose.
Only in France is not me expected the advent of the Internet to change the traditions ...

I found and interesting blog about this topic : https://www.quora.com/Do-arranged-marriages-in-India-really-work

A good reflexion about advantages and disadvantages of arranged/ non-arranged marriages

[quote="JeanPierreD"]

Admin a écrit:

In India, the family head is responsible to marry his children, especially his daughters. In highly conservative circles or in the countryside, adolescents going through puberty are still united. Men marry later, around 26 years on average, but there is no question of staying single. Today, with the advent of new technologies and new ways of life, traditions are shaken ...

There is a site accessible on smartphone (shaadi.com) is a Hindu dating site, and it is not the parents who impose a wedding, but the bride and groom ("futurs mariés") who choose.
Only in France is not me expected the advent of the Internet to change the traditions ...

I found and interesting blog about this topic : https://www.quora.com/Do-arranged-marriages-in-India-really-work

A good reflexion about advantages and disadvantages of arranged/ non-arranged marriages[/quoteThus, when I went back to India in 2010, I told my parents that I will change my earlier decision and now it is time to find my girl through the arranged marriage route. However, I decided to keep the overall thing quite rational and that was quite useful. After two months of conversations with different girls, finally found my girl. My best decision.

http://nymag.com/nymetro/news/culture/features/11621Is Arranged Marriage Really Any Worse Than Craigslist?

There many countries, particularly Muslim countries, where it is still the tradition that bride and groom don't see each other by the wedding and the families choose the spouses. Often these marriages turn out well, because the partners respect and obey their parents and, over time, learn to love each other. But of course, there are also very unhappy cases, where the brides or wives are treated very badly by the husband's family.

As for Europe and Christian society, my impression is that in France and Germany it is now like someone said, first they move together and have children and some day, perhaps, they'll get married. My friends in the UK, however, are still more traditional: they buy a house togetheer, get married and then have children.

hshshhsh

A little hello to Sylvia for I am so pleased to meet her on that forum !

Thank you very much, Muriel. I found this topic most interesting and watched some of the videos. I even posted the one about the situation of women in Afghanistan on Facebook to make us western women more aware of how good life is for us here. I'm so happy and grateful to be born and raised in a western society!
Re the title: I think it should read 'evolving' rather than evoluing - no such word :-)