Dawn French Fan Club 4

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Jeu 4 Jan - 23:10


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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  MurielB le Jeu 4 Jan - 23:14

Yes, People should respect and understand you for whatever answers you’ll give them

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Ven 5 Jan - 11:22

Five surgeons were talking about the best patients...

First surgeon says, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything on the inside is numbered."

Second surgeon says, "Nah - librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

Third surgeon responds, "Try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded!"

Fourth surgeon intercedes, "I prefer lawyers. They're heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and butts are interchangeable."

To which the fifth surgeon, who has been quietly listening to the conversation, says, "I like engineers. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end."

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Ven 5 Jan - 16:13

A man was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit.

The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and went out to see what had become of the rabbit.

Much to his dismay, the rabbit was dead. The driver felt so awful, he began to cry.

A woman driving down the highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong.

"I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed it."

The woman told the man not to worry. She knew what to do. She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the dead rabbit, and sprayed the contents of the can onto the rabbit.

Miraculously the rabbit came to life, jumped up, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped down the road. 50 meters away the rabbit stopped, turned around, waved and hopped down the road, another 50 meters, turned, waved and hopped another 50 meters.

The man was astonished. He couldn’t figure out what substance could be in the woman’s spray can!!

He ran over to the woman and demanded, "What is in your spray can? What did you spray on that rabbit?"

The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: "Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Ven 5 Jan - 16:36

A dog walks into a butcher shop and the butcher asks, “What do you want?” The dog points to steak in a glass case.

“How many pounds?” The dog barks twice.

“Anything else?” The dog points to some pork chops and barks four times. So the butcher wraps up a two-pound steak and four pork chops, and places the bag in the dog’s mouth. He then takes money from a purse tied around the dog’s neck, and sees him out.

A customer, who has been watching in amazement, follows the dog to a house several blocks away, where it rings the doorbell to be let in. As the owner appears at the door, the customer says, “What a remarkable dog!”

“Remarkable?” snorts the owner. “This is the second time this week he’s forgotten his keys.”

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Ven 5 Jan - 16:43


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PS: Pls note that I chose American English for my vocabulary, grammar, spelling, culture, etc.  :-)
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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  MurielB le Ven 5 Jan - 22:25

gerardM a écrit:
A dog walks into a butcher shop and the butcher asks, “What do you want?” The dog points to steak in a glass case.

“How many pounds?” The dog barks twice.

“Anything else?” The dog points to some pork chops and barks four times. So the butcher wraps up a two-pound steak and four pork chops, and places the bag in the dog’s mouth. He then takes money from a purse tied around the dog’s neck, and sees him out.

A customer, who has been watching in amazement, follows the dog to a house several blocks away, where it rings the doorbell to be let in. As the owner appears at the door, the customer says, “What a remarkable dog!”

“Remarkable?” snorts the owner. “This is the second time this week he’s forgotten his keys.”
block of flatsapartment building
block of flats (British English)
Apartment building (Am English)

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Sam 6 Jan - 14:50

Things that took me 50 years to learn, by Dave Barry

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, it's full potential, that word would be "meetings."

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

5. And when God, who created the entire universe with all of it's glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle...

6. You should not confuse your career with your life.

7. No matter what happens ... somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.

8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that person is crazy.

9. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

10. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

11. Never lick a steak knife.

12. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.

13. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

14. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

15. Your friends love you anyway.

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Please feel free to point out big mistakes in my messages in a foreign language. Thanks to your remarks, I'll be able to improve my level.
PS: Pls note that I chose American English for my vocabulary, grammar, spelling, culture, etc.  :-)
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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Sam 6 Jan - 23:33


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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Dim 7 Jan - 16:44


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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Dim 7 Jan - 17:10


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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  MurielB le Dim 7 Jan - 21:47

what is a quickie ? http://dictionnaire.reverso.net/anglais-francais/quickie

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Dim 7 Jan - 21:52

I see that you posted a complete page from Reverso including daring meanings.

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  MurielB le Dim 7 Jan - 22:05

Gérard I wonder why "quickie" is pronounced "quiche"

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Dim 7 Jan - 22:29

MurielB a écrit:Gérard I wonder why "quickie" is pronounced "quiche"
No Muriel.
The guy made a mistake: he wanted to order a quiche; quiche had to be pronounced like in French.
Unfortunately he tried to pronounce in the English way:
- the "qu" was pronounced like in quad
- the "ch" has two pronunciations in En -1-like in chess -2-like in archeology
The guy chose the second.
- the ending "e" is often pronounced like in recipe

The result became quickie (pronounced kwiki), so the result led to a completely different word, hence the slap.

"Quiche" is pronounced like in French.

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  MurielB le Dim 7 Jan - 22:36

I have got it now. Tx Gérard for explaining.

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Lun 8 Jan - 12:07




50 Interesting Facts about the Human Body.
I had no idea.

FACTINATE.COM

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Lun 8 Jan - 15:25




Interesting to have to figure out these built-words.

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Mar 9 Jan - 19:07


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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Mar 9 Jan - 23:15


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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Mer 10 Jan - 10:46


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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Mer 10 Jan - 14:17

A husband and wife go to a counselor after 15 years of marriage.

The counselor asks them what the problem is and the wife goes into a tirade listing every problem they have ever had in the 15 years they've been married. She goes on and on and on.

Finally, the counselor gets up, walks around the desk, embraces the wife and kisses her passionately. The woman shuts up and sits quietly in a daze.

The counselor turns to the husband and says, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"

The husband thinks for a moment and replies, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish."

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  MurielB le Mer 10 Jan - 23:13

a perfect unmannerly guy !

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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  gerardM le Mer 17 Jan - 23:05


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PS: Pls note that I chose American English for my vocabulary, grammar, spelling, culture, etc.  :-)
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Re: Dawn French Fan Club 4

Message  MurielB le Mer 17 Jan - 23:35

Very good idea ! Very Happy

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